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So it turns out DOG anti-vaxxers are a thing

bitchologist:

And they’re just as dumb as the regular ones

And today their irresponsibility resulted in me being projectile Parvo-diarrheaed on (aka dog Ebola)

Which, I mean, my dog is vaccinated for because I’m a reasonable person

But basically my day revolved around chlorine bleach and misery

Oh, and the dog they brought in, which diarrheaed all over my pants and shoes, was the only surviving dog of 3 in their home (the other two died of Parvovirus yesterday), and even though we told them LITERALLY TEN TIMES in no uncertain terms that the dog had to remain in their car and we would come out to do the Parvo test when they arrived, they let the dog out and let it shit all over our grass, so then the grass had to be treated with bleach and blocked off so all of our other patients aren’t exposed to Parvo, because they believed that the living dog’s symptoms, despite all being hallmarks of Parvo, were actually signs of clinical depression from being alone for literally 12 hours since the other two dogs in the home DIED OF PARVO, so they decided, against the advice of the doctor, who went to 9 years of college specifically to study this shit, that actually it would be fine to let him out of the car.

Results of the test? “VERY STRONG POSITIVE FOR PARVOVIRUS”

DUMBASSES.

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So it turns out DOG anti-vaxxers are a thing

And they’re just as dumb as the regular ones

And today their irresponsibility resulted in me being projectile Parvo-diarrheaed on (aka dog Ebola)

Which, I mean, my dog is vaccinated for because I’m a reasonable person

But basically my day revolved around chlorine bleach and misery

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Today I got to hold a 10-day-old baby lion and she peed all over me and clawed the fuck out of my neck and I’m NOT EVEN MAD

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I miss the feeling of losing teeth

It wiggles for a couple weeks, and it hurts a little but it also feels really good to wiggle it, like scratching an itch, and one day you can get your tongue just under the edge of it, and feel the sharp edge of the underside of your tooth, and you sit in class and watch TV after dinner and go to ballet and while you are doing one thing you are actually focusing on pushing your tooth around with your tongue, and eventually it is just connected by one little string of flesh, and you push it just a little further than is comfortable and it rips off the string with a satisfying jolt of pain and your mouth tastes like blood and everyone in class gets excited for you and you get to go to the nurse’s office and wear a little white tooth-shaped plastic container on a string around your neck for the rest of the day, and for a little while after you have a smooth, slippery patch on your gums that kind of tastes like pennies, and you get a dollar under your pillow.

I hope when I’m 95 years old I still remember what it feels like to lose my baby teeth.

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Also, do you know what pyometra is?

Because it happens to a LOT of unspayed female dogs.

Spay surgeries are actually OVHs—ovo-hysterectomies. They remove the ovaries and uterus not only because simply performing a tubal ligation would still allow the dog to go into heat, but because dog uteri are basically ticking time bombs.

Somewhere between one third and one quarter of all intact female dogs will eventually develop pyometra, which is, in layman’s terms, when the uterus rots inside your dog and eventually poisons her entire body and she dies unless an emergency OVH is performed. She might be 10 years old at this time and considerably less equipped to handle the stress of anaesthesia and surgery than she would have been at 6-12 months old when you should have had her spayed in the first place.

I observed an emergency OVH on a dog with pyometra a couple weeks ago actually.

It (the uterus) looked like a shriveled up, papery black sac filled with pus. It’s easy to tell you what it looked like. It’s harder to tell you what it smelled like.

And guess what? Three days later, the dog died anyway, because by the time the owners noticed her symptoms and got her to the vet, the infection had spread to her bloodstream. The infecfion would not respond adequately to antibiotics (antibiotic resistance is outchea, y’all) and she went into organ failure and died before her owners could even make the decision to euthanize her.

Okay, I’ll get off my soapbox now.

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And here’s what’s really sad.

My dog was a pound puppy. When we went to the shelter to look at the dogs, I overlooked her. She was shy and scared and seemed to ignore us. I didn’t see a dog that stood out to me, and I didn’t want to just take a dog, any dog, and have it end up being a bad fit for us.

I was ready to go home and my husband insisted on taking a closer look at our Lily. We argued for a minute, and I asked him to just go home and we could come back in a couple weeks when they had different dogs.

He said, “Let’s just take her on a little walk.”

So we did, and I still wasn’t interested in her. She seemed like she didn’t have a personality. She was being treated for kennel cough and kept hacking up phlegm. I thought she was kind of weird and gross, and Nic said, “God damn it, we decided to get a dog and we are getting a dog today. She is everything we wanted. She is a girl, she is an adult, and she is medium sized. We didn’t want a puppy and we didn’t want anything too small or too big. She is perfect. I don’t care if you want her, I’m paying the adoption fee and she is my dog.”

And thank God he did that, because the dog we met in the shelter was not the dog we brought home. The picture above was taken about two minutes after leaving the shelter. One left turn and one right. You can see the huge smile on her face—she was so happy to have a soft blanket to lay on, to have people scratch behind her ears, and to get some relief from the constant sound of dogs whining and barking, and chain link cages slamming shut, and the echo off the concrete floors and cinderblock walls.

I have learned my lesson, but a lot of people don’t know that an animal shelter is a terrible environment for dogs. Dogs have been selectively bred for tens of thousands of years to be companions. They are very sensitive to smells, sounds, and setting. In a noisy, cold, lonely cage, they become withdrawn and depressed. They don’t get a chance to shine. Had I gone there alone, I would have left without Lily and she would probably have been euthanized. The sad truth is that most shelter dogs meet their end that way. People are overwhelmed and can’t spot a diamond in the rough.

Lily is one of the gentlest, most loyal, loving dogs ever. I think she knows, she remembers that we came along and took her away from a bad place and put her in a good one. I really think most dogs, if given the chance, can show you that side. But most never get the chance. 

Because the odds are stacked against them. Irresponsible, selfish, shitty people deliberately or accidentally let pets breed. 

Did you know that in half a dozen generations, ONE female cat and her offspring can produce nearly 5,000 cats?

Tell me why you are so special. Tell me why you are exempt from doing the right thing.

Here is the policy in most city or county run animal shelters:

Stray dogs and cats stay in the shelter for one week. The shelter is required by law to keep all strays for one week, to give the owner a chance to claim them.

Virtually all owner surrenders are immediately euthanized. So you’re a dumb shit head, you decided not to spay your dog—she was in heat, and got loose, and got pregnant. She had a litter and you realized how hard it is to find homes for 8 puppies. So you took them to the shelter, thinking they would be able to handle them better. And probably 30 minutes after you left the shelter, those puppies were all euthanized. The same thing goes for the cat you took in as a kitten, but never considered the reality of dealing with the challenges an elderly pet can present. The same thing goes for the dog you got a couple years ago without planning what you were going to do when you had to move and your new landlord wasn’t pet friendly. 

SPAY AND NEUTER YOUR PETS YOU PIECE OF SHIT LIKE SERIOUSLY

And here’s what’s really sad.

My dog was a pound puppy. When we went to the shelter to look at the dogs, I overlooked her. She was shy and scared and seemed to ignore us. I didn’t see a dog that stood out to me, and I didn’t want to just take a dog, any dog, and have it end up being a bad fit for us.

I was ready to go home and my husband insisted on taking a closer look at our Lily. We argued for a minute, and I asked him to just go home and we could come back in a couple weeks when they had different dogs.

He said, “Let’s just take her on a little walk.”

So we did, and I still wasn’t interested in her. She seemed like she didn’t have a personality. She was being treated for kennel cough and kept hacking up phlegm. I thought she was kind of weird and gross, and Nic said, “God damn it, we decided to get a dog and we are getting a dog today. She is everything we wanted. She is a girl, she is an adult, and she is medium sized. We didn’t want a puppy and we didn’t want anything too small or too big. She is perfect. I don’t care if you want her, I’m paying the adoption fee and she is my dog.”

And thank God he did that, because the dog we met in the shelter was not the dog we brought home. The picture above was taken about two minutes after leaving the shelter. One left turn and one right. You can see the huge smile on her face—she was so happy to have a soft blanket to lay on, to have people scratch behind her ears, and to get some relief from the constant sound of dogs whining and barking, and chain link cages slamming shut, and the echo off the concrete floors and cinderblock walls.

I have learned my lesson, but a lot of people don’t know that an animal shelter is a terrible environment for dogs. Dogs have been selectively bred for tens of thousands of years to be companions. They are very sensitive to smells, sounds, and setting. In a noisy, cold, lonely cage, they become withdrawn and depressed. They don’t get a chance to shine. Had I gone there alone, I would have left without Lily and she would probably have been euthanized. The sad truth is that most shelter dogs meet their end that way. People are overwhelmed and can’t spot a diamond in the rough.

Lily is one of the gentlest, most loyal, loving dogs ever. I think she knows, she remembers that we came along and took her away from a bad place and put her in a good one. I really think most dogs, if given the chance, can show you that side. But most never get the chance.

Because the odds are stacked against them. Irresponsible, selfish, shitty people deliberately or accidentally let pets breed.

Did you know that in half a dozen generations, ONE female cat and her offspring can produce nearly 5,000 cats?

Tell me why you are so special. Tell me why you are exempt from doing the right thing.

Here is the policy in most city or county run animal shelters:

Stray dogs and cats stay in the shelter for one week. The shelter is required by law to keep all strays for one week, to give the owner a chance to claim them.

Virtually all owner surrenders are immediately euthanized. So you’re a dumb shit head, you decided not to spay your dog—she was in heat, and got loose, and got pregnant. She had a litter and you realized how hard it is to find homes for 8 puppies. So you took them to the shelter, thinking they would be able to handle them better. And probably 30 minutes after you left the shelter, those puppies were all euthanized. The same thing goes for the cat you took in as a kitten, but never considered the reality of dealing with the challenges an elderly pet can present. The same thing goes for the dog you got a couple years ago without planning what you were going to do when you had to move and your new landlord wasn’t pet friendly.

SPAY AND NEUTER YOUR PETS YOU PIECE OF SHIT LIKE SERIOUSLY

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The practice where I work is where the city pound takes all their animals to be spayed and neutered. The ones they think they might be able to find homes for, anyway. Not the ones that get euthanized.

I just… it makes me so angry. Spay and neuter your fucking pets. I literally do not care what your reason is for not doing it. I. Do. Not. Care. You cannot imagine the suffering these animals experience. And it is because there are not enough loving, responsible homes for them.

Spay and neuter your pets, or I will cut off your balls and punch my hand through your pelvic wall and rip your ovaries out of your vagina. Spay and neuter your pets.

If you choose not to, you should be forced to work at the pound for one week—you should see dogs shaking in cages, laying in their own piss on a concrete floor, tails between their legs. And these are the adoptable ones. These aren’t the tiny kittens whose lungs couldn’t keep breathing through a respiratory infection or the dog with mange that the pound can’t afford to have treated or the dog whose response to fear was to growl and show its teeth. These aren’t the animals that are loaded, 20 at a time, into a metal container and gassed to death and thrown in the dump.

I didn’t think there was a job that could have made me hate people more than getting them drunk, but actually this one takes the cake.

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Look, William Eggleston

Congratulations on all the beautiful photography

But holy fuck you are a Drunk with a capital D

Watching this documentary about you is like watching an especially frustrating episode of Intervention

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The problem is, she also uses the political aspect of veganism to isolate herself. She doesn’t talk to half of our family because they refuse to become vegan and vocally disagree with her. She claims that she literally equates eating meat with murder and she can’t have murderers in her life, or she has even told me that she doesn’t consider me her real sister because I’m not vegan and I’m probably on the best terms out of anyone in our family. She says her vegan friends are her new family, and seriously, it is this Vegan Thinspo Meritocracy Mafia. They do not tolerate criticism of them or of a vegan diet. So basically, she chooses to live on another continent and all her friends would interpret any concern for her health as a “bloodmouth” trying to weaken the vegan movement. Basically just imagine her as a heroin addict who aggressively only associates with other junkies.

The problem is, she also uses the political aspect of veganism to isolate herself. She doesn’t talk to half of our family because they refuse to become vegan and vocally disagree with her. She claims that she literally equates eating meat with murder and she can’t have murderers in her life, or she has even told me that she doesn’t consider me her real sister because I’m not vegan and I’m probably on the best terms out of anyone in our family. She says her vegan friends are her new family, and seriously, it is this Vegan Thinspo Meritocracy Mafia. They do not tolerate criticism of them or of a vegan diet. So basically, she chooses to live on another continent and all her friends would interpret any concern for her health as a “bloodmouth” trying to weaken the vegan movement. Basically just imagine her as a heroin addict who aggressively only associates with other junkies.